Silent Love
by tangLaw
Summary: Silence can speak volumes but when it comes to love, silence is painful.


**Disclaimer: **Characters are not mine.

**Summary:** Silence can speak volumes but when it comes to love, silence is painful.

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**Silent Love**

_Romantic flicks are overrated_.

Kirisawa Fuuko thought bitterly, trying to suppress a sniffle as she absently watched the credits of the film she had just watched.

She was plainly disturbed that such trivial and fictional film had triggered her to cry.

_She was never known to be the emotional type_.

But she guessed that recent developments in her life, specifically events involving unfamiliar emotions, must have set off this instability.

_She's in love_.

That should have made her happy, right?

Well, at least that's how the movie makers portrayed a woman in love.

But how come she's not?

In fact, she feels _miserable_.

Before she could ponder on it more, the doorbell rang.

Fuuko immediately turned off the TV and hid the DVDs. She wasn't about to let anyone catch her watching those. She has a reputation to uphold. Besides, she'll never hear the end of it if her best friend, Hanabishi Recca, knew about this.

Her so-called lack of feminine hormones has always been a point for ceaseless teasing but if Recca ever finds out that she's showing signs of having interest in such "girly" things, it will surely be the talk of the century.

After she got rid of the evidences, she opened the door.

Her eyes almost bulged out when she saw who it was.

"Michan."

The very object of her affection.

She eyed him questioningly, not quite trusting herself to say anything more than his name, which alone sends shivers down her spine.

It was clearly a surprise since he hardly associates with her and the rest of their group, although he did once admit that he considers her his friend (ouch!).

In fact, the only person he shows anything comparable to emotions is—

"Yanagi."

_There_.

He even said the name so beautifully.

Fuuko masked the hurt with an encouraging smile.

"What about Yanagi?"

"She sent me here to fetch you." Came the passive reply from the ice prince himself, Mikagami Tokiya.

"What for?"

"Do I look like the Information Booth?"

She had tried so many times to get other reactions from him other than annoyance, but it was all he ever was so generously giving.

She stifled a frustrated sigh but before she could say anything, he spoke.

"Anyway, I'm just following orders."

"The last time I checked _you are not her ninja_."

Fuuko bit her tongue.

That comment was unintentional. She was provoked to inflict the same pain on him since she knew it was a sore spot to the _ice block_.

No matter how much he pines for Sakoshita Yanagi, she will never be _his_. Her heart already belongs to someone else, and that someone happens to be Recca.

_Just like me_.

Fuuko thought sadly.

_No matter how much I pine for you, you will never love me. Will you, Michan?_

After a few more seconds, Tokiya turned and walked away.

Fuuko was snapped back to her senses as she immediately grabbed the house keys, closed the door, and caught up with him.

She walked a few steps behind him for a while before finally strolled beside him.

"I'm sorry." Fuuko said quietly.

Tokiya didn't say anything.

"I said I was sorry." She repeated, a little louder.

"I heard you, okay. You don't have to scream like a hyena in labor."

Fuuko frowned.

"I didn't scream." She mumbled. "And how would you know how a hyena sounds like when in labor."

Tokiya heard her and almost smiled.

_Almost_.

"As expected you wouldn't know since you're watching all the brain cell-killing channels."

Fuuko wrinkled her face and stuck out her tongue at him.

"Well, you, on the other hand, watch too much Discovery Channel and you have become as stiff as a board. At least I'm fun. You're not."

"Hmp."

They walked in silence for a while, then, surprisingly, Tokiya broke it.

"What's on your mind?"

_You_.

Fuuko thought after getting over her initial shock that the ice block initiated a conversation.

The she turned to him in disbelief and asked, "Who are you?"

Tokiya met her gaze and said in annoyance, "Shut up."

Fuuko smiled.

"Sorry."

"Huh?" Fuuko gave him a puzzled look.

"I probably shouldn't have asked that since your brain is probably too small to have anything in it."

Tokiya stifled a wince when Fuuko punched him on the arm. _Hard_.

"So? What's on your mind?"

_You_.

"The answer is still the same." Fuuko unconsciously murmured with a sigh.

"What?"

She looked abruptly at him and forced a laugh.

"Winter is just around the corner. Time flies by so fast, don't you think?"

Tokiya didn't answer again.

Instead, he just stared at her with an unreadable expression on his face.

Fuuko suddenly felt like she's drowning in his ice blue eyes so she looked away.

When she still felt his eyes on her, she walked ahead.

She loves his eyes.

But she also hates them.

She loves them because in his intense eyes she sees what little emotions he allows her to see.

But she also hates them because they remind her that they will always seek and adore Yanagi.

_Earth, open up and swallow me already_.

Fuuko thought, slightly shivering at the sudden gust of wind.

_Oh, how about taking me away with you, wind?_

She felt like snorting but any attempts were cut off when something draped on her shoulders.

Turning, she barely saw Tokiya place his jacket over her.

"Mindful about the upcoming winter, aren't we? Pray tell why you came rushing out the door without a jacket?" Tokiya said without looking at her.

"Thanks." Fuuko answered quietly as she felt her cheeks flushed. "You turned around and left. I was worried and I really didn't mean to hurt you."

_It was just because I was also hurt_. She added in her thoughts.

Tokiya stopped walking.

She was about to ask why when she realized they have already reached their destination.

"Do you know how it feels to love and not be loved in return?" Tokiya asked inaudibly.

_Yes_.

"No." Fuuko chose to reply.

He didn't need to know.

"Do you know how it feels like to have your heart pulled out and realize you're still alive?"

_Yes_.

"No."

"It's like a thousand needles—"

…_pricking your heart, each slowly pushed down to the very end_.

"—pricking your heart, slowly and deeply."

_Yes_.

"Really?"

"That's how I feel when I see Yanagi."

_And that's how I feel when I see you._

"And yet I still want to see her."

_And I, you_.

Fuuko shakily reached out a hand and gently squeezed his arm just to give comfort.

"Michan."

Tokiya turned and looked at her, his expression still unreadable but there was definitely a hint of sadness in his eyes.

He nodded his thanks as he pressed the door bell.

And as they waited for someone to open the door, Fuuko silently gazed at Tokiya.

Unlike in the movies where the heroines get to throw their arms around the man they love and vice versa, that's all both of them could do.

Silently, secretly, soundlessly love.

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**Author's Rants:**

Ouch, huh? Believe me it pained me to write this one but it must be said and written. Besides, every successful love story must start somewhere, right? Plus it's the rule of delaying gratification. Experience the hardship first before the pleasure. nn This is an independent story but I will be posting other stories that are related to this one so please leave me a review so I'll have some motivation to keep writing, 'k? I'll also very much appreciate suggestions. Thanks so much! nn


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